Married Woman, Lesbian Fantasies

Dear Sarah,
I am 37, happily married to a great guy for 11 years, 2 kids, house, great job, etc. American Dream, right? Lately, seemingly out of the blue, I have been having sex dreams (and now even some waking fantasies) about a new female attorney hired by my firm. We’ve had lunch a few times. She is engaging, funny, and openly lesbian, although you would never know it from her looks. I’m fairly conservative, and have never had any sexual attraction to women. This scares me. Please tell me it’s just a midlife crisis…
Shaken

Dear Shaken,
No worries, what you are experiencing is totally normal. Most women have some fluidity to their sexuality and can feel attracted to both genders, although one usually predominates. Someone new on your radar screen doesn’t mean you’re gay, or even bisexual. It does mean this is a good time to nurture the (presumably) committed relationship with your husband. Crushes and attractions can be fun, but can get away from us if we’re not careful. Engaging romantically with someone else would necessitate changing the agreement for monogamy with your current partner. However, if your relationship is secure, is it possible you could use your fantasies about your new coworker to add some spice to your current sex life?